Sparkly Bright Eyes

Owl-ways look on the bright side of life!

planning

When your husband cooks for you – Joining the ‘Men who cook’ club again.

By Leave a Comment

Tonight my husband cooked us dinner. Now in most households, this might not be such big news. Men who cook- what’s new? Well with my husband he has cooked for us maybe 4 times in the last 6 ½ years I’ve known him. And 2 of those have been in the last couple of weeks. Plus when your husband cooks for you and helps relieve some of the strain of the household duties it is such a wonderful feeling!when your husband cooks for you - Joining the 'Men who cook" club again

You see, in his past relationships his partners have criticised his attempts at cooking and ridiculed him for any efforts made as not good enough. He even had dishes thrown at him as they were not good enough in her eyes.

For someone with chronic depression, this was not great. My husband was made to think through this constant negative reinforcement that he was unable to cook. So he believed it was true for many years. when your husband cooks for you - joining the men who cook club - man cooking spaghetti

With a lot of sessions with his psychologist and a lot of encouragement from me, he finally decided to try again. Mostly to start helping me out as a partner should, but also to prove to himself that he could do it.

You may know a lot of men who cook and happily do so. But it has been very trying to live with someone whose answer to being called upon to arrange a meal is to say “Let’s get take out”. This might be okay every so often, but I don’t know a single family whose finances could stretch to do that all the time!when your husband cooks for you - joining the men who cook club - man cooking spaghetti

Even the favourite Aussie male past time of barbecuing hasn’t enticed him to cook more than one meal before. So tonight I celebrated that he has now created a dish in the Thermomix (with some back up from me on what things meant in the recipe) and his all-time favourite dish of spaghetti bolognese.

He may still call me to ask how some things are done. But he is slowly building back up that confidence to know he belongs to that group of men who cook once more. And I love that he is doing that! Maybe I will add a few cookbooks on to his Christmas wish list.

Come see more posts about life with my husband here.

And let me know in the comments how you feel when your husband cooks for you!

HMPB Blog Banner

Avatar

Living with depression in marriage- Depression and relationships can it work?

How to be an organised mum

By Leave a Comment

how to be an organised mum - young mother with arms around toddler sitting on a dock looking out to the waterWhen you first find out that you are going to be a mum you hope that will have your life together and be an organised mum like so many television shows have portrayed over the years. But not all of us ladies have those OCD tendencies to be super organised about every aspect of motherhood. So this post is for those who want to have a bit more structure in their mum life, but have struggled so far in life to get that perfection you’ve seen in so many others.  These are tips on how to be an organised mum from a mum who hasn’t got it all together yet, but knows these things can help.

Use a calendar

We all have things in our lives we need to remember whether we are a stay at home mum, have a career away from home or do something from home while juggling the kid stuff. This could be things from birthdays to medical appointments, date nights to when bills need to be paid.how to be an organised mum calendar options

There are so many choices with technology these days that you are not restricted to just pen and paper items. There are apps for calendars and planning – complete with reminder alarms that can be set to remind you of each event.

But first I would organise a calendar that is on display for the whole family to see. Whether you have an event involving the kid’s soccer training, your partner’s days off or when the electricity bill is due, they will all be visible to the whole household.

You can then keep your own personal events in a diary, planner or app of your choice that travels with you.

Write down all things that you need to remember for certain dates. This many include:

-school events
-play group
-medical appointments
– birthdays/anniversaries
-school holidays
-your holidays
-bills
-appointments

Have a place things belong

When you are not organised it can be so easy to misplace important belongings. My husband is forever misplacing things he needs and then panicking if he can’t find them when he’s running late. So find a spot for items in your house and ALWAYS put them back in that spot.

Some common things that will need their own spot are and suggestions where to home them:

Keys- key rack or bowl

TV remotes- spot on coffee table

Dirty dishes- on sink or in dishwasher

Shoes – place in wardrobe or under bed

Towels in use- towel rack

Toys – toy box or book shelf

 

Shopping Listshow to be an organised mum infographic

Shopping with children (especially toddlers) can be one of the most daunting experiences as a mother! But when you get to the shop, with child in the middle of the worse tantrum ever, and forget what you actually needed to buy, it can be super frustrating.

Get a notepad you can leave in the kitchen. I find a long one with magnets on the back that sticks to the fridge is perfect! Even if the bench gets inundated with dishes or other stuff, it can still be found.

Whenever you run out of an item from the fridge or pantry, write it down. If something is running low, write it down. Before going shopping, check what you might need or refer to a checklist.

This not only limits the ‘what else did I need’ moments, but also cuts down on the budget blowouts of impulse buying.

Don’t put things off

My last tip on how to be an organisehow to be an organised mum infographicd mum is not to delay too many tasks. Yes, there might be a few things we put aside as we have to wait for our pay to come in, but it shouldn’t be everything!

If a note comes home from school, fill it then. (If you have to wait for your payday for that excursion fee, put a reminder in your calendar about it NOW).

You see something out of place, go put it away now. Don’t keep stepping over it to leave for the next five months.

Hopefully following these simple things can help you become more like that organised mum you’ve always dreamed of. And don’t panic if you can’t achieve them all! Baby steps can help us in our journey to become a more organised mum.

Avatar

Being a mother is tough – working out this parenting gig (again)

7 different ways to spoil your Valentine without flowers

By 5 Comments

7 different ways to spoil your Valentine without flowersWhether you are married, have been together for years or just dating, Valentine’s Day can be an expensive occasion! The price of gifts and flowers goes up for the day, far above the usual costs. But not everyone can afford to get rich, lavish bouquets of flowers year after year, and all the extras on top, plus a night out somewhere fancy. (Especially if you have a lot of birthdays around end of January and February like our little family). So I’ve put together a few ideas for those who want different ways to spoil your Valentine without flowers.

Have a Picnic

Here in Australia, Valentine’s Day is at the end of summer, so quite warm still. Pack together a picnic hamper and take your Valentine out to a favourite location -a park, the beach, etc. We love going to our local lagoon and watching the ducks and swans whilst we sit on a rug.

Cook a favourite meal

Does your loved one have a favourite dish that you can create at home? Why not spend the night in, cooking it together. Put out the fancy dinnerware, open a bottle of wine and throw in some flowers from the garden. Or those romantic candles you never get a chance to use except in power outages. A nice romantic dinner for two, that you have both helped create can be delightful! Or a breakfast with just the two of you!heart biscuits, Valentine's day cuppa

Experiences

Try something new with your Valentine. Arrange for a horse riding outing, a hot air balloon ride or take a trip to somewhere you’ve never been before. New adventures can help sustain that spark you have for each other, rather than being stuck in the same boring old routine all the time.

Pamper Session

Whether you get your Valentine a pamper session at the local salon or some DIY products for use at home, pampering is always appreciated! Ladies and gents all need a little bit of time to unwind and relax after the busy lives we live these days! I love it when my husband helps fuel my love for Jamberry wraps and other beauty experiences.

See a Movie

Find out a current movie your Valentine is keen to go to, and organise tickets to go with them for a session. (And be sure to not critique or ask constant questions during the movie!)

Make your own Slideshow

Using photos of your Valentine, create a digital slideshow or album for them. Let them know which moments you’ve enjoyed having with them.

The gift of Time

Sometimes all our partner wants is a bit of time spent with you, their partner. Time that isn’t taken up with worrying about the kids, the mortgage or how work has been. So set aside some time to just be the two of you together.

wedding couple holding hands

Now, I still personally won’t say no to the flowers if they turn up on Valentine’s Day. But I’d also love if some of these other activities were thrown into the mix. I do enjoy knowing that my husband loves me and wants to spoil me in any way he can. If you have any ideas of different ways to spoil your Valentine without flowers, comment below.

Getting ready for a happy new year- time to be consistent!

By Leave a Comment

Getting ready for a happy new year 2018- time to be consistent!It is nearing the end of 2017 and time to start thinking of what the next year will bring! A lot of people like to set themselves a new year’s resolution. The new year’s goal they wish to work on for the next year, and hopefully improve something in their life by being consistent with that. But what is a good new year’s resolution? What should you work on or hope to improve on? What should your new year’s resolution 2018 be?

What should your new year’s resolution be?
Click To Tweet

I’ve known a lot of people to set a new year’s resolution that is standard to so many others out there. “I will lose weight. I will eat healthier. I will exercise more. I will quit smoking/drinking. I will get out debt. I will travel more”. They start January off very inspired and determined to keep going for the entire year. But a lot of these goals are often spur of the moment wants, and they don’t have the mindset behind them to keep going when it gets tough. And yes, generally people can get lazy about these new goals that will make their life so much better (or so it seems in their minds).

My new year’s resolution

This year I’ve followed the teachings in the Socialite Suite and had a guiding word to follow for the year instead of a goal that I might give up in a few weeks because it was too hard. For 2017 my focus word was ‘brave’. I wanted to feel brave seeing I took a second year of maternity leave from teaching to spend more time with my toddler and teen. I wanted to be brave and continue with my direct sales business and see where I could get with it (and I needed to be brave to do some tasks to help with that). I wanted to be brave and try something new, like learning how to start my own blog. And I think I’ve bravely faced all those challenges and more this year!

Be Brave!
Click To Tweet

You then need to surround yourself with I reminders about your focus word. It could be photos, memes or images you’ve made. Maybe the word written on every page of your yearly planner/diary. But the more you remind yourself of it, the more consistent you will be in keeping with it, and following through on task that achieve it.

As having a focus word for my New Year’s resolution 2017 worked so well, I’ve decided to do it again for 2018. And it’s been a bit of a struggle to find the perfect word too! I want it to cover all the things I’d love to achieve in this coming year. Yes, like many women I want to lose some weight and be more active as that’s better for my Multiple Sclerosis. I also want to declutter my house (and life) which is so overflowing with things since my husband moved in a few years back and I brought my school stuff home when starting maternity leave. I want to regularly do work on my blog, as the last month or two have been crazy busy! And I want to show my teenage daughter how to not become overwhelmed with her senior high school studies.

2018 here we come!

My focus word for 2018 is Consistency
Click To Tweet

The focus word I have settled on for 2018 is ‘consistency’. To be consistent with scheduling things for school, Jamberry and home into my planner (which I just picked up the other day from a friend’s place…I’m excited!). To establish routines to consistently do tasks around home and have everyone in the house contribute in these tasks. To follow up with customers in my Jamberry business in a timely manner and keep my Facebook pages and group running smoothly.

So I look forward to 2018, the year of consistency. Comment below with what your focus word will be for the new year! Let’s celebrate together what will focus on! And if you find this post a few months in, or at the end of the year, know it’s never too late to set your focus for the remainder of the year!

Avatar