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Road trips with kids – toddler road trip essentials

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road trip with kids - toddler road trip essentialsWe recently took a car trip to Canberra from Sydney with our toddler to see Floriade. As we journeyed, these are the thoughts and ideas that came to me about surviving a long car trip with a toddler and other kids. (And yes, some of this did happen to us! ) So here are my musings on road trips with kids and toddler road trip essentials to make your trip more enjoyable.

Musings on road trips with kids.

Be well rested beforehand! A long drive and a cranky toddler is not something to handle on little sleep. Same goes for older kids who like to ask hundreds of questions.

Don’t let your toddler take off with one of their drink bottles before you leave the house. It will get left behind! Thank goodness you packed another!

Similarly for the older children, check that they have all things they require for the trip packed, as heading back home after an hour’s driving is not a nice option.

Train your children to like music you don’t mind listening to. Otherwise you’ll be stuck listening to the same album of children’s songs for hours on end! Or with older children give them a listening device and earphones.

Don’t put on moisturiser before feeding them at least 2 snacks. It is nearly impossible to open a packet of biscuits with your hands all smooth!

When you stop at McDonalds (as let’s face it, it’s one of the only regular stops on Australian Highways where you can get food fast enough to appease the ravenous toddler who just finished biscuits, a cheese Stringer and a banana), DON’T let the toddler catch sight of the children’s playground if you don’t have time for a play session. There will be major tantrums!!

Be prepared for the toddler to practise a variety of vocalisations in an attempt to amuse themselves.

If you stop and wake toddler for a break stop, it is doubtful they will sleep for the rest of the day. Choose carefully!

For the older kids pack some games they can play in the car without needing your help (particularly if you will be the only adult in the car). Lists of things they need to find can be good for those who are able to read. Electronic devices such as tablets or music players are very handy for game apps or movies to watch, providing they are charged before leaving. (Remember to pack all chargers for them too!)

Toddler road trip essentials

  • Pack a snack bag with things that are easily managed by your toddler, and that won’t be too messy. Some things you could include: biscuits, cheese Stringers, yoghurt pouches, fruit, muesli bars, water bottle.
  • Take a small basket of toys for the car trip and the time away. Nothing with little tiny pieces that can easily get lost. Of course, this basket will be upended to be used as a drum 30 minutes into the trip.
  • Have a back seat mirror on the back headrest for your rear facing child. You can see them, and they can see you. Saves on the screaming! (well …sometimes it does. Let’s face it, sometimes these toddlers just want to experiment with screaming).
  • A change of clothes in the nappy bag for drink bottle spills or nappy explosions is a great idea!
  • A sleeping bag, blanket and comfort toy for bedtime can give familiarity to a strange location. Order a cot/crib for your toddler too if available.
  • Take toddler-sized sunglasses as they will grizzle if the sun is in their eyes too long!

Hopefully following some of these tips, your next road trip with kids will be enjoyable. What essential thing do you think is required on a car trip with kids? Comment below.

Being a mother is tough – working out this parenting gig (again)

How to stop breastfeeding a toddler (who doesn’t want to give up)

Being a mother is tough – working out this parenting gig (again)

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being a mother is tough

Being a mother is tough some days! Real tough! You just want to give it up, throw in the towel and go do something less stressful. Memories of days where you could eat a hot meal in peace are just that- a distant memory. And I’m not saying parenting can’t be tough for the guys too. But a lot of it is still dealt with by mothers. Although Stay at Home dads have increased in numbers in recent years, they still are a minority. Mums are known for having to think 6 billion thoughts about the needs of others, before themselves. Breastfeeding- nope, my husband can’t do that and the determined toddler has refused a bottle since she was 6 months old. Settling- when at her worst hysterical moments, only mummy can calm her down. Organising meals- yep, you guessed it. Mummy again. Sorting out the next season’s clothes. Wondering which school they will go, if they’ll make friends easily, and how you’re going to afford it. The whole world of motherhood is hard.

Being a mother of a toddler

My latest moment of finding being a mother hard was this morning. I sat down to breakfast, after dealing with the rigmarole in getting a 3 course toddler breakfast (well toast, cereal and fruit counts, right) and this happened. Eleanor lost control of her cereal bowl and it spilt cereal and milk over the corner of the table, my legs, my slippers and the floor. My little one sat there in her highchair going ‘Oh! Oh!’, whilst milk dripped further down my leg.

I sat there in shock to start with, and then tried to figure out how I could mop up this mess without making it worse. Of course there was not a wipe in reach (a rare event when you have a toddler in the house). And not even the packet of serviettes was in range! And no one else is at home! I can scarcely ask the little one to pop over to the sink and grab some paper towels. She’s safely strapped inside her high chair. And it’s a slim chance she could follow that instruction just yet.

So of course my toast was very cold when I finally got everything cleaned up. Eleanor wanted to have some of that too, even though she had the same thing, Vegemite toast, right in front of her… apparently mine is better. Why do they need to eat everything that mummy has? Although I guess it might help with my weight loss plan that she demands every snack I have. In reality it’s probably just an easy way to see something isn’t poisonous. Mummy is eating that one, so it’s okay. Heavens knows what this stuff in front of me could have in it!

Then we get to dressing for the day. The toddler is dressed by mummy. Thankfully she’s not yet at the age where they insist on dressing in the most weather inappropriate clothes. I realise halfway through getting myself dressed that I have completely forgotten how to dress as a normal non-breastfeeding person. Which is rather strange as she only feeds mornings and evenings now. But my mind still insists on dressing in accessible clothing as it’s just been so long since I dressed any other way. If I had to return to teaching work right now, I don’t know how I’d cope! Or be able to be dressed before 9am for that matter.

At least today we have avoided the excessive toddler grumpiness, over-tiredness and refusals to go to sleep. I’m sure that last night as I tried to get her to sleep for the umpteenth time that I was practically banging my head against the cot rails questioning why I ever thought having another was a good idea. I love her more than words can express, but sleep deprivation is torturous…especially when the person keeping you up can’t express why they won’t go to sleep. Is it teeth hurting, nightmares, the cold winter night or just wanting to snuggle with mummy?

And so ends my day. With those numerous thoughts still running through my mind, and finally a few moments peace to myself as both girls are in bed. I’m sure I should be in bed myself, but that’s not going to happen! Too many things I want to do that can’t be done whilst in mum mode. And even though I’m exhausted and frustrated with those little things when they happen, I just have to look at my girls to know that I’ll gladly do it all again for them tomorrow and the next day. Yes, being a mother is hard! But the rewards of spontaneous hugs, wet kisses and baby snores are pretty damn good too!

Want to read more about my parenting adventures?

holding hands with child

 

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Age gap worry- how long to wait between kids?

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age gap worry v2 feature couple walking holding hands

So many parents seem to have ‘Age gap worry’. They want to know when is the perfect time to have the next child for their lives to go smoothly. Well people! I’m afraid I have to tell you that there is no real magic number that will work for every couple.

Age gap worry- what is the perfect gap?

Some people like to have their kids super close together…which basically means falling pregnant very soon after having the first child. The idea in mind here is that all the little baby stuff will be over sooner if they’re closer in age. And that they will have someone to play with as they grow up. Being so close in age though can mean they go through all the stages of growing up together, toddlerhood, tweens, and teens with a partner in crime. Also, not all siblings get along and play nicely together, so your plan of peaceful interaction together can quickly change to refereeing a boxing match every hour.

Other people like to have their kids further apart. One child starts school and they have the next. This can be to try and avoid sibling rivalry. And being older does not always guarantee avoiding the jealousy curse. I’ve known ten year olds who were completely jealous of a new arrival to the family group and that act worse than some 3 year olds.

Of course all the perfect planning in the world doesn’t guarantee a thing when it comes to kids. Wishing to have an age gap of 2 years between each is all fine and well till it comes to the falling pregnant. There could be issues with fertility and being able to fall pregnant at the right time. Some ladies seem to fall pregnant so easily at that time in their cycle that the slightest look can see them with the next bub a year ahead of schedule. Issues with staying pregnant are also common. I’ve had a dear friend recently who went through a few miscarriages before her current pregnancy. The human body just doesn’t care about these self-imposed deadlines we set up in our minds about our families.

The best laid plans

And lastly, sometimes life and its journey gets in the way of the perfect age gap. When my eldest was 3, I wanted to start trying for a sibling for her. Along came an MS diagnosis, followed by separation and divorce. I didn’t think that the opportunity to even have more children would ever come along my way given my age and medical issues. But it did! I met a new guy, and we eventually decided to try. This resulted in our beautiful toddler, when my eldest was 13. Everyone is shocked at the gap, those who don’t know us that is, but it has been lovely. A caring big sister who just adores her little sister (most of the time) and helps out so much with her.

age gap worry teenage girl holding her newborn baby sister

So don’t be afraid of the ‘Age gap worry’ when it does the rounds in your social circles. You can worry all you like, plan all you like. What is perfect for someone, will not necessarily be for you. Those little personalities do not always match up to an ‘ideal age gap’. Just enjoy those kids, whatever time they come.

What age gap have you got between kids? What do you think is the perfect gap? Comment below.

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Why toddlers drive us crazy (or at least a little bit nutty)

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why toddlers drive us crazy

 

You hear it all the time from mother’s of children under the age of 4. My toddler is driving me crazy! I can’t do a single thing whilst they’re around! Can they please stop whining? It will drive me insane if I have to do this for 3 more years! Help! Pass the wine please! And yet we never seem to know why toddlers drive us crazy.

Yes mums! We’ve all been there! From the time when they start moving on their own we are in a constant hyper vigilant state of watching what they might get into next, finding out that they can now reach higher than they could yesterday and more redesigning of the house needs to take place and planning if it’s easier to just get rid of everything in the house or just move to somewhere bigger where they can be confined to an entire room by themselves. There are good reasons why toddlers drive us crazy though. Let me explain!

Why do toddlers do these crazy things?

Well, it’s actually all part of their development to want to explore and test out these new things they can do. If I grab this basket, it falls down on top of me. Wow! Let’s do that again! Hey mummy! What’s with taking it away? I’ve just discovered this cool new concept…I think I’ll call it falling down. Okay, let’s go see if I can make something else fall down. I call my little toddler an explorer as she’s not content to sit and play with the boys at mother’s group. She has to go test out the bubblers…all 4 of them! And see what’s on the other side of the park…then come back to check mummy hasn’t left her. Then off again to watch that marvellous thing mummy calls a swing.

It’s all about learning

Everything is brand new to the toddler mind and it’s natural for them to be inquisitive about it. Otherwise how else would we learn all these amazing things as humans? Just this evening my toddler stood outside while I took clothes off the line and stared, fascinated with the dark clouds in the evening sky. Something we as adults have seen so many hundreds of time. But to a little toddler, it’s a stunning new experience. There’s things in the sky. Why do they move. What are they doing up there. I wonder what they are called.

Toddlers are beginning to develop their vocabulary. At first they won’t have many words, but they will understand a lot more than they can say themselves. It’s super important to help build on the words they know, to help with their speech development. As tiresome as it can be to name every single thing your toddler points to in a 30 minute pointing session, it is so great for their language skills to have you repeat those words again and again for their tiny brains to process and categorise. That thing is a cup, but so is that one, and that one.

Toddlers are so very impressionable! They are like tiny sponges that can soak up everything around them, and then try to repeat that word/action by themselves. I’m constantly reminding my husband to watch his language when around little Ellie, as I know how children can so easily pick up that one word you really don’t want them repeating to the entire world. And though you know that if you don’t make a fuss about it, it might not be a repeated event, they seem to have a knack of catching you off guard. Oh my goodness! What word did she just say to that old man! I am so embarrassed!

Now for some skills

This impressionable stage helps the toddler learn a lot of skills they need in life…and maybe a few we wish they didn’t learn. From the start they watch parent’s faces. They watch us eat our food, and eventually we let them have a go at that stuff. Of course shoving a whole handful of chips into her mouth is not what you expect them to pick up (hubby to blame again!) And does anyone know a toddler who does not mimic a phone conversation on any item they can find around the house. Our little one even mimics her father’s speech patterns to a tee!

One skill I didn’t think my toddler would pick up so quickly was trying to play the chanter of a bagpipe. Hubby plays it one time, yes, one time for her. For about 2 minutes before heading off to work. I go to the bathroom, turn around from washing my hands and find her standing there with his chanter. Making the noise with her mouth as she can’t work out how to blow in it, but knows how it’s supposed to sound. Now anytime she finds something vaguely cylindrical she has to play it like a bagpipe chanter.

Working out our world

We know that toddlers are not doing it intentionally. They don’t stay up late at night plotting ‘What can I do next to drive her crazy?’ Our tiny little terrors are just trying to work out this crazy world with the rest of us…we’ve just had been longer at it. See I told you there were good reasons why toddlers drive us crazy!

Looking to the future

In all honesty, though toddlers drive us crazy, at least they can be quite cute about it. Or at least mine is! Nature’s way of keeping them safe during those trying moments I suspect.

And the next stage along will be better (we hope). Or if not better, at least will throw some differences our way!

Come join me on Instagram to see more toddler moments.

 

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